It helps me sleep to type this stuff out when I get to thinky.
Is our true nature good or evil? Selfish or altruistic? Your answer to that may shed some light onto your true nature or at least what kind of people you were exposed to when you formed beliefs like this. Anne Frank said she thought people were basically good. She was right about herself but wrong about narcissists. Narcissists believe everyone has a bad nature and are on guard from it. You can't appeal to a narcissists better nature, they don't have one. The truly good person believes they can change the narcissist with empathy and love. Both sides are correct about themselves and in LaLaLand about the other. You can change yourself though and that might be the best you can do to change others.
Narcissism and co dependence may be the psychological names for the pathology of our culture. Ours is the dominant culture. The one that a couple of generations back thought slavery was okay, and before that committed genocide against the native people of this country. We are all still nuts and committing eco-side. We have to heal up our brains. This all might have started with the first civilization. The very first city 10 thousand years ago. Then it slowly spread. Daniel Quinn explains it well in his books. http://www.ishmael.org/origins/DQ/ The first city brought hierarchy. No longer people working together in tribes (the only system that ever sustainably worked for humans) Quinn writes about the "Takers" and the "Leavers". Or how I would call it "jacked up people" and "decent folk". The first hierarchy. People over other people. Royalty and people who need to be told what to do. Narcissism and Co-dependents. It's not just life on earth that is at stake now, it's what has always been at stake, our mental health, happiness, and sweet sweet connection, intimacy, and freedom in this short life that may be the only one we ever know.
Even though we can't change bad people we can still stand up to them and still have compassion for them. We can still work on ourselves and help the little man. We can do this because there is no room for blame. They are just acting out their conditioning. Acting unconsciously. Without the conditioning of your mind and your ego and all that crap, you might just be the universe or god or something. Get rid of that stuff and connect. If you want to play the stupid blame game then you can see that we got screwed up because of how our parents or others in our lives acted when we were young... but they only did that because of how their parents and early influences acted towards them and on back until... the first city. Maybe there was the first asshole. Original sin? The first sin? I don't really know anything about that concept. hahaha.
The following are some quotes I found while reading around. Look it up yourself if you want a reference (yea, I'm super professional, huh?)
"Some theorists estimate that 96% of Americans are codependent." "This past summer [a study of] a nationally representative sample of 35,000 Americans found that 6 percent of Americans, or 1 out of 16, had experienced [clinical narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) at some point in their lives."
Those percentages spill over on each other. Anyway, everybody is affected by this stuff. It's so widespread that some call it a "narcissistic epidemic". Our society is run by the narcissists. Narcissism is lack of empathy. People can seek personal gain at the expense of others or without caring how it harms the planet by not having empathy for those people, animals, and things.
Codependents are easily influenced by narcissists. Narcissists are also pretty good at influencing non codependents. Here is one way they do it with language and memory. http://www.winning-teams.com/teamwork_narcissism.html
How could it be that in our society so many people try to get the same material crap and vision for what is presented to them as the perfect life? It's a bunch of easily influenced masses who are influenced by master manipulators who have no empathy. That's how they can sell us products that they know are harmful and we all to often don't question it and just go along. Everything that mainstream society makes is like this. They don't care about you. That's why the shows and movies will make you think divorce or cheating is normal and also show an unrealistic perception of love instead of teaching how to connect or make real intimacy. If you stay discontent you will stay complacent and shop and go to your slave job more. Not many Buddhist monks would go to a shopping mall. Almost everything that comes from a non empathetic system is going to be toxic. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3lrqjcvIiEc
So maybe 96% of people are codependent... That many people with their heads full of chatter that need to get in the now, live in the present moment, ask themselves the important questions and truly, honestly get to know themselves, and connect to the energy of the universe (god, a higher power, the Tao, your real self deep down, whatever you want to call it) and stop trying to influence others and help themselves. That is the cure for codependency. That's what society at large must do. While doing that, narcissistic people must still be stopped from exploiting and destroying the living world.
It's a long path of self realization to find out if the wants you've had your whole life are really yours.
No comments:
Post a Comment